Some memories never fade

Something is finally solved. I stressed quite unnecessarily. I always care to much. After all everything seems easier, than it was in last days.

I found out, that I like to help people with ordinary things. Lend pens, give an advances, help with studying etc. It's simple. Why am I doing this? Because being nice to people is simply. Making enemies only make you feel worse. I have serious problem with mean people. I can't stand when are people mean at me. Now they aren't, but I've read my old diary and it remind me something. I hate when someone is laughing and I think, that he laughing at me. It's paranoid and annoying. I haven't reason to be afraid, have I? I need just stop worries and stop caring so much.

Old diaries are such a funny thing. I've read mine. In the age of 13 I have written: "I want to have rich beautiful perfect husband." What was I thinking?! I don't belong with this kind of people. Why should I have perfect husband, if I've never been perfect? Define perfection. Who need a rich husband anyway? I could be rich on my own. Lol, never. I was naive, wasn't I? Nope. I was just thirteen year old dreamer. I'm still trapped in dreams. But I'm more realistic. Sometimes pessimist. Usually not of being unique in this shy way.

Let me dream

But maybe, just maybe I'll have my fairy-tale and prince, white horse, palace... or just true friends, loving husband, good job and liberally full of good books. And I'll be happily ever after anyway. You know what is most important feeling in the world? Happiness.