Quotes In My Pocket - Part Two

April

"The point is that Charlie's story is so real... I swear, you will love it. I was so touched by this story... People writes that it made them cry. But i personally didn't cry at all."

"Sometimes you have to do something what is normal."

"I'd rather do million another things in my free time. Bad luck, i'll have to dance with some guys (or worse... classmates), because it's what normal people usually does."

"Sometimes, when i'm with kids i feel like i go back to my childhood. I'm not saying i'm not OK with my age. Moreover, i'd like to be older... But it's amazing to spend time with children that love you no matter what."

"I feel like i should impress people. I'm afraid they won't like my favorite music, film, book, whatever."

"I was looking at an old pictures and wishing i clould go back to that moment."

"I thought: Everybody looks happy. Except me. I felt like i don't have anyone to talk to. "

"We hadn't seen either texted each other for couple months and now we just go out and talk and i hope everything will be ok again?"

"We were just together. And that was enough."

May

"I was so afraid to send it, but i've done it. I don't really know how to feel about it."

"I have to stay strong and polite."

"She was my sunshine on a rainy day."

"I don't want us to be strangers again."

Girl Who Ran Away

I wanna look back at my beginning with this blog. I've created it on the 21 of December. I love that fact, because I've created a blog on the "end of world date". I'll never have a second chance to created anything on 21.12.2012. Have I created a good one? I should say no, when i look at number of comments. My articles are not qualitative. How dare I write blog in English when i'm not good enough in that language. I'm angry at myself because of it. I have no one but myself to blame. But I've written this blog for me. No matter how bad my blog is... I'm glad i have one. It's a true part of my life. I've always been honest here. I've never pretend i'm anything what i'm not. I have a few amazing readers. It's something like my internet home. I've written 40 articles in almost six months. Now I want to recapitulate everything.



I'm going to create a new "summer" blog. I'll let you know about the it, you can follow me in case you want to.


I didn't knew ho much exact will the name of the blog's url be. I've wanted to run away from my problems. I've always been afraid to face the problems. But escaping anywhere (not even to the beach or sea, away from school) won't save you from your own mind, the problems won't magically desapear. There will always be something. When you change school you might lost the old problems, but you'll find the new ones. Sometimes you just create problems in your head that don't even exist. I'm still looking forward to "better years to come" tough my life is not bad eighter too difficult. You know I worry too much. When I think about a distant future I'm optimistic. I dream about running away from everything that makes me feel sad or inferior. I'm gonna travel the world and so on, but being happy comes from ourself, we probably can't make us happy just by running away.

So damn true.

Here's my first post http://girlwhorunaway.blogspot.cz/2012_12_01_archive.html I've written some wishes and things I wanted to make happen. What's most important, I've written: I want to change my life. Has it happend? Have my dreams and wishes came true? Let's look.

1. I used to think possitive (at least i've been trying) a few weeks. However, I'm mostly a pessimist. So I've failed in order to stop being a pessimist.
2. I can say, that I enjoy little things.
3. I get along with my classmates!
4. I was strong enough to say "no", when i wanted to do ti!
5. I'm stronger than i thought i am.
6. Let's just say i'm happy, sometimes, I'm surviving high school yet and i don't have any enemies. Generally i don't have any troubles. Not without anxiety. Almost no tears eighter depression! Can't say if i'm less fearful. Probably, I'm not. I'm mostly afraid of something (of problems/people/failure).
7. I still care about what other people think of me.
8. I've planned to be possitive. Silly me! I'm not an optimist at all.

Quotes In My Pocket

I'm reading everything again. Recapitulate. I want to post some interesting (?) alternatively meanful texts from my old articles. I know it might seem selfish. But i don't wanna forgot theese "quotes". This is the part one - until the April.
Do you like any of them?

December

"I wish you happy new year with no stress and depression. 2013 is going to be better than 2012. I hope so. Everyone deserve to feel better, believe me." Btw: This is the better year.

"I do have so gorgeous mum. Even if she is not and never was like Donna. But I don't mind. She keeps my family together and I can talk with her and trust her. I wish I can make her proud one day. " Btw: I've made her proud 3 months later.

January

I'll be girl who run away for better life. 

"I need to work in friendly environment with motivation. I don't wanna just surviving day by day." 

"One day I'll live somewhere faraway and everything what makes me miserable will be only a memory. I don't know how I know it, but will run away."

"I'll be myself. I'll live my own way. I'll meet my lost friend. I will make myself and my parents proud. I'll be happy and free." Btw: Done.

"I'm just watching my life wonder what if and daydreaming at school."

"I should not care about what people thinks about me. But I do care even if I'm smiling and pretending that everything is OK."

"I hate being (and feeling) alone in a crowd. What if the ugliest girl at school has more friends than I?!"

I'm sorry, but I love this one: "Schooldays are like bubblegums - sweet at the beginning, but then they are losing flavor and you get bored by chewing them." It's my own idea

"I can't just believe that everything will be ok and think positive for real."

February

Last five years

"I don't party all day, all night. I hate this kind of fun. I don't smore or drink at all. I'm not wild. And I'm ok with it. People should be ok with it too. Cause I'm not gonna change myself to belong. I wouldn't feel like I belong anyway. Because I don't. I'm me."

Read this one if you want. You know whats is sad? I don't believe in it anymore. It would be nice, though. Because as I wrote...

"It's the only thing which is worth it to believe in. Because if everyone will know and act with people as equals it'll come true. People will be finally taken as equal becouse they are equal! People just have to start believe in equality of rights."

March

"I found out, that I like to help people with ordinary things."

"I can't stand when are people mean at me. Now they aren't, but I've read my old diary and it remind me something."

"You know what is most important feeling in the world? Happiness."

"I just wanna spend holidays in my own happy way."

"If my 8 year old self would met me, she would be proud. I'm sure and it makes me happy."

"Dear Katie, succes doesn't make you happy. I mean it's not most important thing in life. Happines doesn't come from being succesful. It comes from your soul."

Facts On A Friday Night

Sometimes I can't believe that...

• I have real friends.
• people want to talk to me.
• people want to sit next to me in the class or during lunch.
• someone wants me to be in their group.
• people think that i'm talented.
• someone laughs at my jokes.
• someone really loves me.
• someone chose me to be in his/her group or team.
• someone cares about me.
• i am the best (friend..sister..daughter..whatever) for someone.
• someone thinks that i'm pretty.
• my little cousins loves me.
• i am good enough for my family.
• i am an interesting person.
• i write well.
• i'm someone's reason to smile.
• my opinion is important for someone.
• someone understands me and knows how i feel.
• i am a good (mean a kind) person.
• can anyone ever knows me.
• i can make my dreams come true.
• i could win/be the best in something.
• anyone will ever loves me no matter what.
• the certain person miss me.
• i'm someone's first choice.
• we can be friends again.
• i'm irreplaceable.
• not everyone thinks i'm weird.
• everything will be ok.
• i ain't gonna live forever.

Mighty Songs

Nothing else but music

This text is accurate.

¨

This song makes me sad. Could you guys believe it? It becouse of the person, who have posted it. It's like... it has been written for us. It reminds me of us so much.

We sang it at school. It was so atmospheric. Moreover I totally love this song.

A rainy day

I'm happy today. I was writing a story almost all day. I baked muffins. I went out with my cat. Running and playing with her. I listen to good music. I don't mind the rain. I'm gonna read a book, spend a few time with my mum and watch some movie. Hope you feel okay today. GN!

I know this song is old, but i totally love it!

Just amazing!

So beautiful song!

Days spend with her

Yeah, so screw New York!

On wednesday (1st May) we met outside and talked for a while. After that, we went to my room. I lend her my favorite book. Moreover she read the story i've written. She likes it. It's nice when you see a friend laughing to something what is supposed to be funny. We decided to play The sims 3. Friend hasn't played it before. So we created a Sim. I showed her city and told her what to do. This doesn't sound like fun, though it was. I choose to be happy. A day spend with friend is always a day spend well.

The best Friday ever

We haven't planned that we spend 3rd May together. Notwithstanding she texted me she won't have time on weekend. So we changed pans and went out on Friday afternoon. It turned out to the day we enjoyed so much, tough it was raining. She were my sunshine on a rainy day. We talked and smiled alot. We took pictures. We were listening to my favorite music (Everything has changed, Stay, You take me there and Back to december) which had a meaning. We played our favorite The sims 3. 

We were going to go the house of my friend. I was raining but we didn't mind. We had an umbrella. We talked about the old times and it was pretty amazing. I love those talks with my friend. We went to her house to see a Marley. It's a dog who fetches a ball, jumps... Marley is just awesome. She took a care of him. Then we came back to my place to continue in playing the sims 3. No worries. Mom prepared a dinner for us. When it stopped raining and we stand in front of the my house, hugged goodbye. She said: "Today it was a good day." I smiled: "Yeah." I don't want us to be strangers again.